STORMHAVEN YOUTH RANCH

Well, gang, we are not only full, but are overloaded with tons on the waiting list!!! Thank you so much for honoring Kim and Troy this way and we cannot wait to hear their amazing messages. Troy will be speaking at the Southeast Christian Church’s Saturday Morning Men’s Bible Study at 7 am in Louisville. No registration is needed, but it is only for men:) If you can’t make it into the dinner, we still would love to have your donation! The Paypal button on the “How to Help” page on the website still works, even though we have disabled the purchasing one on the Home page:) WE LOVE YOU!

Stormhaven Flyer REV 1

#1. OK. So It’s time to send tax receipts in a Christmas card for this year’s supporters.
#2. I happen to have a couple of hundred leftover cardstock calendars that someone surprised us with as a donation. If you fold them in half, they make beautiful, large cards. They are personalized with a thank you inside from some of the ranch kids.
#3. Uh oh. Do they even make envelopes this big? Should I try to make the envelopes out of paper? I have one month. I’ll just find some.
#4. Forgot. One week left. OK. Gonna forget about it and go take a break in Louisville with a couple of friends.
#5. We are leaving Starbucks and one of them hands me a bag and asks, “Could you use these?” Inside are a couple of hundred red, very large envelopes. My mouth drops open. She had no idea. Of all the outrageous things to hand me…
#6. Well, with a tiny bit of trimming, they fit perfectly. Slip a donation receipt inside and we’re done. Just in the nick of time.
Coincidence? NO way.
Provision. Even in the tiny details of running this ranch.
Details are not trivial to God. He wants me to daily be dependent on Him, not to fret, and look for Him to blow my socks off.
I love my Lord. He has such a sense of humor.
Huge red envelopes? WOW.
“…for your Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask Him!” Matthew 6:8

Captain Von Trapp, learning every word to every song in The Sound of Music, French horns, classical music, furry white rugs that must be shaken so the fur stands up, Scrabble games and murdirt—she, won the game –can still hear her laughter as she told this New Yorker that was what they called the red clay in Mississippi, Dr. Zhivago ,ballet class and leg slaps, Southern pride and deep drawls, befriending a Yankee, obsession of a band director, perfect posture, getting the hair just right, hysterical laughing together til the tears flowed, “Marisa, sit on my bed…” , dark paneling and delicious food , crazy brother with the big smile, dad in Speedo, mom’s sweet smile and hospitality, cute little terrier Taffeta, marching band contests, passion for a perfect sound, crystal clear Smith Lake, first outhouse, riding horses and bouncing, hours together waiting out the long rainy Mississippi winters, forgiveness after all those years, brokenness , “Gaye, please don’t forget me”, …oh, dear friend, how could I? I was so lonely and you came along. Thank you for your faithfulness over 46 years, always checking on me, reaching out to me, checking on my mom, in your searching you came to KY, surrendered your heart and found a new best friend. Thank you , Jesus. Take care of my friend. I will always remember you, Marisa.

We’ve been under a lot of attack here lately. Satan seems bent on destroying us (duh) and driving me to break chairs. I’m really mad at him.
He’s messing with relationships. He’s making mountains out of molehills. He’s trying to convince God’s people that it’s so hopeless that they should take their own life. I watch as things seem to fall apart around me…
So I go down to the woods.
There is a huge cross down there built for a very special girl who needs to lay down her struggles on a regular basis (just like the rest of us, but she shows outwardly what is really going on inside of us all; but she is more honest)
Next to the cross is a natural spring—a trickling little brook that is sure and strong most of the year, but every fall it seems to stop and dry up. The water tables fall and all that is left is mud interspersed with dry cracks. I felt that way a few days ago.
Jeremiah intercedes for his people in one of my favorite books, chapters 14&15. He asks God, “Why have you wounded us past all hope of healing? We hoped for peace, but no peace came.” 1
Then God rants. (I think He threw a chair) He’s done. “You have abandoned Me and turned your back on Me…Therefore I will raise my fist to destroy you. I am tired of always giving you another chance…” 2
Then Jeremiah speaks for himself. “I am neither a lender who threatens to foreclose nor a borrower who refuses to pay—yet they all curse me.”
Then God replies, “I will take care of you, Jeremiah.” 3
Jeremiah says, “Lord, You know what is happening to me…Please step in and help me…Your help seems as uncertain as a seasonal brook, like a spring that has gone dry…” (hmmm)
God says, “If you return to Me, I will restore you so you can continue to serve Me. If you speak good words rather than worthless ones, you will be my spokesman…They will not conquer you, for I am with you to protect and rescue you. I, the Lord, have spoken!” 4
Another version of that says, “If you return(and give up this mistaken tone of distrust and despair)then I will give you again a settled place of quiet and safety, and you will be my minister; and if you separate the precious from the vile(cleansing your own heart from unworthy and unwarranted suspicions concerning God’s faithfulness), you shall be my mouthpiece…
“…And I will deliver you… and I will redeem you…” 5
My favorite part is the last—-“ I , the Lord, have spoken!”
Hey! He’s talking to us! In conversation! The One Who created the universe!
Am I listening?
It’s gonna be okay. Really. Ever need someone to just hold you and tell you that? I do.
But I couldn’t forget the “If you return …” part.
That’s why there is a cross in the woods.
Sometimes we just need to get up, walk down there, and drop. Come join me.
Don’t worry—I sprayed the poison ivy.:)

1 Jeremiah 14:19 2 “ 15:6 3 “ 15:10-11 4 “ 15:15-20 5 “ 15:21

Chocolate Chip (CC) was perfect. He not only looked like he walked out of “Western Horseman,” but he acted like it. “Bomb-proof” pretty much says it. Bree was perfect. He melted your heart just to look at him. He had so many physical problems that the children were instantly moved with compassion and couldn’t get enough of him. Pete and Leia were the perfect dogs. They gave us many faithful years and served us with all their hearts.
Raya is perfect. He pushes through his blindness and his ability to show love is astounding. He knows if you are 5 or 65 and senses what you can handle and keeps you safe.
We lost CC to cancer. By the time he showed any symptoms, one lung was already gone. We lost Bree to a septic digestive system. His little body just shut down. Pete & Leia died within months of each other. Old age breakdown is hard to watch. Our little ranch has seen much loss in its short 5 seasons.
Now we must let go of Raya. His body is failing and he is in much pain.
“I can’t do it, “ is the first response for both Lexy and me. And it’s true. We can’t. For her, he is the best friend she so desperately needed who lifted her up out of her hole and walked her through hard times. He was there from the beginning, when she came to the ranch as an angry, shut down, hurting child. His calm spirit and ability to love her was moving. They made music together. He would do anything for her. He led her to God. Lexy and her mom & brother were recently baptized in the trough following a decision to trust Christ.
Last night I pulled my faithful intern, Erin, aside and bared my heart. I knew the decision I had to make, and the weight of responsibility was crippling me.
“I don’t want to hurt Lexy. She’s been through so much. Why is God choosing our little ranch to go through so much loss? This isn’t fair.” The questions I had counseled the girls through so many times were now coming out of my mouth.
My flesh battled for control. Then God spoke through her and reminded me of the Truths I knew deep within my heart but that were being smothered by my pain—
“It’s not about you or the children. It’s about obedience. You are being called to a higher place of trust. Some ranches are called to great blessing and ease; some have been called to suffering and difficulty.”
I went to Lexy with renewed strength. God said, “Tell her now.” I could see He had gone before me and prepared her heart, as the tears had already begun. My heart broke for her as she sobbed in my arms and the same questions I had just asked God came pouring out of her mouth. And then—it happened.
The reason this little ranch exists. Things came full circle.

I had prayed last week that before the summer ended, these girls would own it for themselves—that they wouldn’t be dependent on me or the ranch, but would run to God’s Living Word for their help—
I watched in awe as the girls who had struggled so with those exact questions in their own painful journeys, came alongside Lexy. They spoke God’s Truths over her and shared their own stories of pain and victory and how God had become real in their lives in the last few months and how suffering had its purpose…how much God loved her…
Then they did it. They ran to the house and got their Bible.
I am weeping on my face right now in awe of my God. There is no greater blessing than what I just witnessed. That is Christianity. Lexy will not be walking this hard road alone.
Jesus is the only true perfect One. He is just showing us Himself through the animals. He is the One who will walk with us. It is His strength and it is His courage we must walk in as we face tomorrow’s pain. And how can I tell people about God’s provision in pain if I am not going through it myself?
It has been a rough few days, as the new 6 mo. old filly, Molly, colicked and choked twice in a 12 hr period, but is now restored. It hurts as God has called us to move a few horses to some wonderful homes, but He is replacing them with a new one who is also “bomb-proof.” We look forward to watching God speak through him. We all sensed God was going to do something incredible this year at Stormhaven—(like give us some more land) but what He chose was much more valuable. He’s growing our hearts instead. God is good. All the time.
Please pray for us. “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me…” Psalm 23: 4

I don’t know what else to say about it except that God is healing Raya.
Mike was on the tractor we are borrowing. I was working with horses. Last week I took Raya out to graze. I had laid down his lead rope and left him there. He can only walk a few steps at a time—or so I thought—
Romeo—I mean Raya—perked up his head and whinnied at his love, Gracie, who was still in the pen. Then he trotted—on all 4 legs—over to her. My jaw dropped open. Mike stopped the tractor, turned it off and just sat there staring. We believe we witnessed a healing. It was as if the heavens opened and God pointed to Raya and said, “Enough, be healed.”
Since that day his swelling has subsided, he uses that leg regularly, trotting, spinning, and even cantered a few paces in the arena to catch up with Gracie. God is not only using Gracie, our primary angel in horsehair to foster the new 4 mo filly, Molly, and give her a reason to sing, but Gracie is Raya’s ultimate love and is back to pushing her around and claiming her as his mare, giving dirty looks to any other gelding that looks her way.:)
Lexy is elated, to say the least.
We all are. We love him so and God has given him back to us and we are dancing and celebrating—even if he is 30 yrs old and has a limp, and nearing the end—we can enjoy him for a little while longer!!!!!!!!
Everyone, especially our wonderful, wonderful vet, is amazed. God can do anything. Don’t ever doubt that.
Sometimes He chooses to heal here in this life, and sometimes He heals us by taking us home, but He heals. Sometimes it looks totally hopeless to us and He moves; sometimes we believe and trust for that healing and it doesn’t come as we want it. But He still heals. And sometimes that healing is taking place in our hearts instead showing itself in a physical healing in the one we are praying for. That’s hard for us to see and it’s hard for us to accept. But there’s always purpose in pain. His purpose.
Thank you for the tears you are shedding for us. God is catching each of them in His jar. Please continue to lift us up in prayer, as the attacks continue and disappointments still come. God is moving at this little ranch, and He is good—all the time.
Jeremiah 17:14 “Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed; save me and I shall be saved, for you are my praise.”

As we said when we were kids, “P U!”
I never really knew what that meant, other than, “That stinks!” and you’re supposed to hold your nose when you say it.
The bandage I’ve been changing twice a day consists of a newborn diaper, vet wrap, and honey or ointment. It’s been almost two weeks since he got kicked in the cheek, and the swelling revealed itself to be an abscess, which exploded with all kinds of putrifying aromas. As the skin dies and falls off, the wound is down to the muscle. To keep the flies out, I have designed a halter made from vet wrap that holds the absorbing diaper in place. All those hundreds of saturated diapers throughout all those baby years were nothing compared to these.:)
The patient is our yearling colt, Lakota. We guess that he was in the wrong place at the wrong time and one of his hormonal mother’s kicks landed on him. He’s eating, Praise God, and his jaw is slightly askew, which we are praying will not need surgery.
But the thing that gets me is his surrender. He stands there patiently as I wash away the infection and rotting skin and he endures the penicillin shots, takes his banamine…
I’ve been loving and handling him almost daily since he was 4 months old. He trusts me. We have a bond of understanding that says, “I will take care of you.” This twice-daily ritual could be such a difficult job—but other that the stink, it’s not.
How do we handle it when God cleans off our stinky, nasty, rotten flesh? He brings us into circumstances that purge the rot, gently cleansing away our stink—fostering healing.
Do I hold still and let Him work?
Do I fight Him and try to get away?
Do I trust that He’s taking care of us?
Lakota’s doctoring put a halt on a getaway weekend to see a new grandbaby, and, along with the worry I lay down every day at the foot of the cross over these horses, God is cleansing away my rotten flesh of expectations and control, throwing me curves and keeping me totally dependent on Him.
Psalm 51:7 “Purify me from my sins and I will be clean;
Wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.”

Jade. I don’t know much about her story, but what I do know is she’s been hurt to the point of emotionally shutting down, going catatonic. Once she reaches this point no amount of prompting, pushing, or pressuring will make her move. In fact to continue to push her becomes dangerous. She lashes out in an attempt to find relief. Beautiful horse, very sensitive, but guarded and distrustful. It seems past experiences have made her this way.

Sometimes I watch her out in the pasture. She is usually alone, away from the other horses. If you wait long enough she’ll haltingly make her way towards the fence wanting attention but uncertain whether you are safe. It’s as if each step she is asking,”Do you want me? Can I trust you?” A battle of fear and desire. Once she comes to the fence she’ll stay there and slowly relax with each stroke she receives. But the minute the other horses come forward she’s gone. Sometimes they chase her away. Other times she leaves before they have a chance. She returns to the farthest corner of the pasture. Watching. Guarded. In those moments I see myself in her.

Thursday I had the opportunity to ride her. It was the first time she’s been ridden in over a year. So we moved slowly. Once we got used to each other we headed towards the arena to work building back trust between horse and rider. In the beginning she was fairly responsive, not certain but compliant. As I started to ask more of her, to take more steps or turn in a specific direction she started to shut down. First her walk slowed, then an attempt to be near the other horses. Finally her bottom lip would go limp and begin to nervously quiver. If I asked her to continue she would freeze, her body becoming rigid, eyes glazed and fixed, and ears cocked back. Nothing would move her. The pressure and fear of new situations jaded by past experiences caused her to freeze. So we would wait and wait. Then try again. This would go on a step at a time or a bend of the neck and then rest. Short tries with many breaks and reassurances work with her. I realized she has to learn that not everyone is here to demand or push some are here for partnership.

A couple days later God used this horse to show me things in myself. We are soo similar. Guarded, sensitive, distrustful, quick to learn, wanting to please. I was reminded of God’s patience and love. It is amazing how he uses our past experiences, especially the painful ones to reveal truths about Himself. God waits for us to relax, to yield to His leading, to take just one step towards Him so that we might rest in His love. But how often do we dwell in self-centeredness fixated on the hurts of the past to the point we are debilitated. At times I shut down like Jade withdrawing from others, emotionally unable to move to the point even my body becomes tense. Pressure does that and I too have exploded hurting others in an effort to relieve the pain ease the pressure. But somehow all my efforts make it worse…It is only Christ who can take us beyond ourselves

. He waits for us not wanting a single one of us to perish. He waits and waits putting encouragement and blocks in our path in hopes that we would just yield, just take one step towards Him so that His love can cast out our fear. He promises in I John 4:18: “Perfect love casts out all fear.” His is the only perfect love. Others hurt us sometimes intentionally, but most often out of their own pain unaware of the damage they are causing. And so we find ourselves in desperate need of One who is Love, not as we understand it but greater, more powerful. And He is here all around waiting. But we must yield and take that first step even if our lips are quivering neurotically, our body’s tense and the fears screaming “Do you really want me? Can I really trust you?”

Working with Jade reminded me that His answer is always, “Yes, I want you. Step toward me. Yield and you will find trust.” Each step taken rattles the hold fear has in our lives and His love gives us the power to find freedom. Freedom in Him.

“The Lord gives, and He takes away, and He gives again. Life holds seasons of despair and seasons of dancing.”
This is a quote I have on my mirror. I put it up after we lost little Bree. Now God has challenged us in another season with another horse who is a beloved Stormhaven favorite.
Raya means “friend” in Hebrew. And boy, does he live up to that name. He was once ridden on trail rides by an 80yr old doctor. When I received the call from his widow who was desperate to place her horses, I heard how special this gelding was as she tearfully told me about him.
She had broken her leg and her kids were putting her in a home.
Raya is the –-always dependable–can put anyone on him—first to be chosen—probably the most used horse on the ranch. Anyone who has ridden him will agree that he loves to run, and is inspiring as he fearlessly races Chance around the arena in spite of his failing eyesight. Raya is going blind.
Now he has another obstacle. A possible fractured femur— basically, a broken leg. It could have been the horrific rainy season—a slip to avoid a kick—we don’t know—God knows. But the prognosis is hard. Most owners would say he is useless and put him down.
But we are a ranch of the broken.
There is a line in the movie, “Seabiscuit” where the trainer says, “You don’t throw away somebody just cause they’re banged up a little bit.” The entire movie is based upon that simple statement. As three broken men restore a broken horse, they are healed themselves.
So there is our decision. We sat down with Lexy, who has poured countless hours into training and loving Raya and the two have a relationship that will take your breath away. Her reaction was stunning.
“That’s ok—he doesn’t have to be put down.” She is willing to put in the countless hours again to nurse him back to health—whatever that will look like—maybe even on three legs—and sacrifice ever riding him again—
Lexy will tell you that she is a life that was broken and that God has restored her. She knows exactly how to love her broken horse and to accept his new role. Life is teaching us all to roll with the punches and go on through our brokenness.
So whatever Raya’s future holds, he will be loved. And think of all the children who need to come help him heal! God knows what He is doing.
Ps 34:17-20
“The Lord hears His people when they call to Him for help. He rescues them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those whose spirits are crushed. The righteous person faces many troubles, but the Lord comes to the rescue each time. For the Lord protects the bones of the righteous; not one of them is broken!”